When I first started writing this, I was going to call it “Big Brother get the hell out of my mouth”, but then I worried that people would be offended thinking that I was making a joke about incest. This is NOT a post about incest, nor do I think incest is a joking matter! It is however the post in which I finally show my ass, because I am tired of having technology SHOVED down my throat.
I should probably start at the beginning.
It’s time for my six month check up at the dentist. (well it was time 2 months ago, but technology has made something as simple as getting my teeth cleaned a fricking nightmare)
For the past several years, I have seen the same dentist, same office, same staff, same same same. Great! This year though, two weeks before my appointment, the office staff called to say, they no longer accept my insurance, would I like to pay out of pocket or pick a new dentist?…..Seriously?!?!? Did you just decide this? Maybe a little bit of notice? and to be honest, I would like to hit you in the head with a dental tool if that’s an option.
Oh Grace, “we sent you an email in January letting you know that these changes were taking place.”
You mean you sent an email to the address Iamgivingyouthisbecauseyouaremakingmebutiwillnevercheckit@gmail.com ?!?!?
Hmm I will get right with you on checking that. And it never occurred to you to try picking up the god damn phone to call me?… WHATEVER! apparently our relationship is over.
I called my insurance company to find out where I had to go. Went through the push this for that and that for this game, only to be told I had to visit their website to pick a dentist. That process alone took a month, but that is a whole different rant. Finally, I made an appointment at this new dentist. I am still smh at the last question the receptionist asked me before I hung up….”Is there anything we can do to make your visit more comfortable?” …………..Like what?….. I responded, “yes, please be on time”….they weren’t.
I showed up for my appointment at 8 am, they finally called me at 8:30. (The reason they were late is because the tv in the lobby wasn’t working) ok? smh… I sat through new xrays, gum poking, etc, and and hour later was advised that because some of my gums were swollen I should have this procedure done which would go underneath my gumline for a more through cleaning. Don’t worry though it will only cost you $465.00 (because you have insurance)…oh and here is a free new toothbrush for you.
Oh But Grace, this is a SMART toothbrush, you just snyc it with your smart phone and it will help ensure that you are brushing in each quadrant of your mouth for the recommended amount of time, and you can also upload your records to your hygienist……Don’t believe me? click the link ^^^^^^
to me this translates as….
Once you have given us permission to access your contacts etc we will spam the hell out of them trying to sell them a toothbrush as well. We will work with facebook to be sure to include these ads on all of your friends pages too.
I am a smoker, and a massive coffee drinker. I brush my teeth multiple times a day, for more than the recommended two minutes. I don’t NEED anything to make me more comfortable in your chair. I need you to clean my teeth! I need you to be on time, or at least something close to it.
SMH….
Of course, they couldn’t clean my teeth THAT day, they had to make another appointment. Fine appointment made, be back in a week.
Oh I came back in a week alright…to be told that because I didn’t confirm my appointment via email, they had to cancel….. and yes I did give them the same email Iamgivingyouthisbecauseyouaremakingmebutiwillnevercheckit@gmail.com.
My appointment has now been rescheduled for next week. I walked out of the office and right back in telling them I would like to confirm my appointment.
About a week ago, my smart phone quit working and I have been patiently waiting for a replacement to be sent. (I am pretty sure the 200 texts I got from their office have something to do with the breaking of my phone)
I hope that next week, after my teeth are cleaned, all of this “shitty talk” will stop flowing out of my mouth.
In all seriousness though, I am not saying that technology itself is a bad thing. I am saying that I want people to realize that nothing in life is free, and you might be giving up more control than your realize if you depend on it.
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MS Graceful...NOT! 